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More Grandpa Davey Speaks
A Path with a Heart
Answers
A Stop at Willoughby
Can't Captue It
Choices
Corrections
Crossing Texas
Ewe To?
Girls
Golden Biscuits
Invest in Yourself
Killing Me Softly
Leave it to Beaver
Locke Machine
Lost in the Grand Canyon
Mind Over Temperature
Mother of all Storms
Mr. Wizard
Mysterious Money
No Sense at All
Not Shadow People
Poverty Point
Queer Creatures
Reckless Abandon
Shadow People
Squirt Gets Run Over
Sub Prime
Surrogates
TEOTWAWKI
The Cheapest Medicine
The Golden Calf
Ticket to Freedom
Two Types of Girls
Vaya Con Dios
Wake Up!
Where's the Beef?
Worst Case Scenario |
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Girls
The other day while shopping at a sporting goods
store, I encountered a young couple purchasing ice auger blades.
They reminded me of why boys get married and the devices they must
use to achieve their desires. Upon finding his choice of mate, it is
only natural for a young man to forsake all others, and to love,
honor, and cherish his chosen. Most of all, he hopes to share this
adventure called life. Together they will go to his special places,
and participate in his special activities. Surprise! Sometimes the
other party has ideas of her own.
 I’ll tell this story from the male perspective, as I make no claim
to understand the other view. There are many that will gladly tell
you, in detail, the other side, so I won’t begin to try.
Once while meeting with a purchasing agent, we listened to his
female assistant ranting about doing more than her share of work. In
response he informed me, “They’re not like us.”
I’ve often given a pet turkey credit for teaching me about women.
Each time I exited the kitchen door, Turkey would violently attack
me. I came to realize that this was just her way of greeting me.
With no malice intended, she just attacked because she was a turkey.
The young man at the store had just taken his bride on her first ice
fishing adventure in sub zero temperatures on a wind swept lake. He
provided her with a heated ice hut, all his excess clothing, and
fished in only his sweatshirt. This wise man had learned to bargain.
 Although one may say that I have a ways to go, I also have learned
many tricks of the trade. Early on I learned that camping requires
bathrooms. Using my Boy Scout skills, I once fashioned an excellent
latrine. I’m still proud of the lashed seat and privacy tarp, but
found it not up to girl specifications.
Girls are a wary lot. With due diligence one may find that they can
drag them out to the woods, deserts, mountains, subject them to
heat, cold, biting insects, and large predators. After enough time,
they may discover the purpose was not to torture them, but to enrich
their lives. Sadly, some girls allow their husbands to do man things
while they limit themselves to girl things. This is not what most
guys envisioned. Allow this to continue, and one day the boy will
find himself taking cruises, gambling, eating at buffets, and
shopping at duty free shops.
While canoeing on a beautiful mountain lake, I observed two couples
also on the lake. The men struggled against a stiff wind while the
women sat in the front of their boats, paddle-less and doing
nothing. I could only imagine what these boys had hooked up with. My
criticism was abated when Sweet Mom observed that they were at least
there. Now I realize that each is different, the shrews, and the
shrew tamers. Some have a hard road, but to give up is defeat.
At the check out of the sporting goods store, the young man bought a
pack of hand warmers. He knows what he is doing.
©12/17/08
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